Family Drama, Nostalgia, and Then Some

I remember a time that was much simpler than this. One where my cousins and I would run and play for hours, without a care in the world. Somehow, all of that dissipated with time. Adulthood came in, along with responsibility, Not So Empty Roomand innocence was then lost.

Over the years, my family has fought over many trivial matters. Like many other families, ours is a bit of the dysfunctional sort, but we manage because we are filled with love. With so many of us now gone, it has brought the remaining relatives closer…or so we thought.

Now, I have a family of my own to care for. My three-year old son is full of energy and needs my attention all of the time. So, you can imagine my displeased nature when I got a phone call Monday about my other family members having a little “drama” going on.

It seems, my sister, (someone I love unconditionally and thought could do no wrong) has posted something online for the world to see (on the social network that shall remain nameless that I’ll just refer to now as “FB”.) I’m not much into social networking sites for personal reasons. I had an incident a few years back where some jerks invaded my privacy and then began internet bullying me afterward. This is one of the reasons I remain somewhat anonymous to this day. (Hopefully, someday that can change.)

Anyway, back to that phone call.

So, my grandfather called me up to let me know my sister was ranting and raving about Mother’s Day and how much she hates it because her mother never gave a damn about her and some other horrible (and partially untrue) things I’d rather not mention.

This couldn’t be farther from the truth.

Although my mother had her problems over the years, she loved us both more than we sometimes deserved. To give you a little back-story, my sister and I grew up in separate homes, and away from our mother (long story) but we remained in contact over the years. In effort to make a longer story short – this hurt my grandfather because that was his daughter, and she is deceased. Not to mention, how it has effected me…I mean…that’s my Mom. I cannot describe to any of you in words how much it hurt when she passed away. She was so young…and so am I still, so it was a devastating loss.

My sister is younger than me, and like I said earlier, grew up with a different family – so I can somewhat understand her pain/anger. I’ve felt similarly in the past. However, the difference between my sister and I? I could and would never say something that hurtful.

My problem now is how to get the message across to my younger sister that this was not only inappropriate, but hurt a lot of family members that still very much miss my mother.

It seems I’m always the figurative janitor of the family. When they fight and argue with each other, I’m the one that cleans up the mess.

This brings me back to something my awesome aunt said recently: “I hate drama, that shit is for high school kids. I like boring. Boring is my new fun. Give me my boring little life any day.”

Undone
As I wrote this, I listened to this:

Alela Diane – Take Us Back

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6 thoughts on “Family Drama, Nostalgia, and Then Some

  1. I read this while we were waiting at the hospital today, DD. My heart fell a bit for you as I know this type of family conflict is always difficult to diffuse and heal. You are wise beyond your years, and you are a voice of reason. I’m sure that’s why you are the one to be the arbitrator in the family. Hopefully, your sister will understand what you have to say to her and will remove the offending comments. It’s one thing for us to be hurt by something a family member has said, but I always grieve a little more when the grandparents are hurt. Hugs to you, dear, and I hope this is resolved soon.

    And your aunt is awesome. 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

    1. I hope this will fizzle out soon too. I think it will, though. They just have a lot of unresolved issues that need to be addressed first.
      Something tells me I’ll have to be the mediator/peacemaker there too.

      I’m getting to old for this stuff. 😛

      & My aunt rocks. She was born in the hippie era & has this chill + mellow outlook on life. She’s a firecracker too, though.

      Like

  2. There’s no drama in my life, but it’s far from boring. Family squabbles are the worst and there comes a time when you either have to just let go, or avoid certain parties if need be until a cool off period can make things better. The problem with many families is that people need to put communication first and leave drama and gossip behind. If you can’t talk to your family, then who can you talk to?

    Liked by 1 person

    1. I agree. There hasn’t been drama in my life either (not since high school) – so I’m with my Aunt on this one.
      Her life isn’t boring either, but I knew exactly what she meant – (free of arguments, focusing on her kids, etc.)

      I’m thinking avoiding it is the best thing I can do as well. I just feel so bad for my grandfather. It really, truly hurt him & I don’t want him to end up disliking one of his daughter’s kids just because she’s being an idiot right now.

      Sadly, I know I’m probably going to have to be the one to patch things up.
      :\

      Like

Dream on, dreamer

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